06 Aug Open Adoption

98% of the adoptions we assist with at Colorado Christian Services have some degree of openness. In fact, we believe that openness is healthiest for the adopted child. The benefits of open adoption are numerous, far too numerous to mention here. Beyond the ongoing communication and the medical information that is shared in open adoption, the reality is that you can never have too many people loving on a child! This goes for people in the child’s birth family too! All children deserve to know their roots, where their unique physical characteristics are from, and they to be told the circumstances of
their adoption.

Openness is about meeting the needs of children, not adults.

Lacking real information, adoptive parents are likely to assume the worst about the circumstances of the adoption. Adoptive parents’ inability to answer their child’s questions about these circumstances may amplify the child’s sense of rejection by the biological parents. That is not fair to anybody!

With access to their birthparents, children can gain insight and ask questions about their roots and identity. Also, birthparents that are known and accessible, allow for the child’s better understanding of his/her adoption story. This affords the child a chance to ask any questions that may arise throughout the years.

Children thrive when the circumstances that prompted the adoption decision for their lives are shared with them. Relationships with some degree of openness give adoptive parents the best opportunity to answer their child’s questions effectively thus solidifying the child’s sense of security and feelings of being loved. Feeling loved will provide self-esteem, security, and a greater faith in as they grow and develop into whole, well-rounded adults.

Beatitudes of Openness

Blessed is the adopted child who learns from the cradle that she is a unique individual, with heritage from two families.

Blessed is the adopted child who feels unfettered by guilt when asking about his birth family.

Blessed is the adopted child who believes in truth and honesty; because these qualities have been nurtured throughout life.

Blessed is the adopted child who feels free to be totally herself, because she has been shared with others.

Blessed is the adopted child who has every question answered honestly when the question is asked, based on his level of emotional understanding.

Blessed is the adopted child who is armed with all the facts about her heritage when it is time for her to make a place for herself in this world.

By M. Griffin, M.S.

Reference: Open Adoption: Pros and Cons